2212 replies to this topic

[Spud_133]

Why do people leave there lights on and foot on the brake when sitting in lay-bys?

[1984mini25]

If God didn't create the sun until the 4th day, how could anybody have known what day it was? 

 

God must really love stupid people, as he's made so many of them.

[samsfern]

Woman at work today "if the job takes half hour, how long will you be?" Me "well, errr, half hour..."

[1984mini25]

Woman at work today "if the job takes half hour, how long will you be?" Me "well, errr, half hour..."

 30 minuets...

[M J W J]

 

Woman at work today "if the job takes half hour, how long will you be?" Me "well, errr, half hour..."

 30 minuets...

 

 

1800 seconds...

 

or

 

1/48th of a day

 

I overheard someone at work saying 'well we will just have to convince health and safety'. This is in reference to a device with a spinning cutting blade.   Good luck with that one.

[M J W J]

If God didn't create the sun until the 4th day, how could anybody have known what day it was? 

 

It doesn't matter if it was a day or not. Like all work men he would have arrived late in the morning and then charge until 5pm yet clock off at 1.

Edited by M J W J, 15 November 2013 - 10:59 PM.

[ShaunaFTW]

Why is grated cheese so much better?

[silver_toes]

If someone has suffered a mishap/accident, they are often described as being 'in the wrong place at the wrong time'. Surely a double negative produces a positive - therfore the person wouldn't have ever had the accident in the first place.

 

I would describe it as being in the wrong place at the right time.

[sledgehammer]

Why is grated cheese so much better?

 

It just is - don't question it ...

 

especially when on hot chips , after a lot of beer

[AVV IT]

Why is grated cheese so much better?

Than what??...... MDF?? Syphiliss?? Napalm??

[ShaunaFTW]

Why is grated cheese so much better?

Than what??...... MDF?? Syphiliss?? Napalm??

Than not grated cheese.

Edited by ShaunaFTW, 15 November 2013 - 10:32 PM.

[M J W J]

Why don't mugs fit in cup holders? (I'm on about china ones not the travel mugs here). While resetting my EM light yesterday I tried to put a mug in my cup holder but because of the handle it wouldn't fit and stay level. Ironically a pint glass will fit in my mondeo's cup holders.

 

Why do the cows in the field behind my house sound like a phone vibrating on a surface when they moo? So many times now I think my phone has gone off only to realise it was the cows outside.

[megamini_jb]

Why is grated cheese so much better?

Than what??...... MDF?? Syphiliss?? Napalm??

Than not grated cheese.

[M J W J]

Why are people on ebay such a**holes?

 

I am forever having to deal with people who don't pay for items and tonight after finally getting 100% positive feedback again after a year some d*** leaves me negative feedback on a £2.98 item because the plastic clips were broken- translation: he broke them.

 

All my adverts say that if you have a problem then please contact me first and I will do my best to sort it out. For a £2.98 I would have just given the guy a refund as it isn't worth the hassle but no he has to give me bad feedback. I've followed it up with the comment 'why didn't you contact me before leaving feedback?' Unfortunately I can't leave negative feed back as a seller.

 

If it wasn't for the fact that it has the market to sell spares and other stuff to I probably wouldn't use it due to the amount of problems I have had with ebay over the last few years.

 

When I come to sell my mondeo I won't be listing it on ebay.

[AVV IT]

Why are people on ebay such a**holes?

 

 

Call me a snob if you like, but I think that the main problem with eBay nowadays is that like the internet in general, it's been completely opened up to the great unwashed! I used to use eBay back in the early days, and without being too elitist, it was a pretty select bunch of people that used it back then. You had to actually own a PC for start, know how to switch it on and connect it to the internet, which also meant having a land line, as well as a contract with an internet service provider. Single brain celled chavs, who are only able to do access it these days, by using their idiot proof, pay as you go, touch screen smart phones, weren't therefore able to use it back then. 

 

Nowadays eBay is so accessible, that all the reasonable, intelligent, people who actually have a sense of moral values and decency, have been completely diluted by a tidal wave of scum, who just don't give a damn about anyone or anything but themselves!